B’Man’s Sabbath Watch: Jesus Walked With Dinosaurs

February 1, 2009

When I saw this picture, I knew that I had seen it before in some sort of children’s Bible book. And it brought back the image of Jesus on horsedinosaurback with a sword in hand, ready for the rapture. The Bible got the stuff about horses all wrong. It was dinosaurs. I also notice that this particular Jesus looks like I did when I was in my 20’s. This is something I didn’t realize, but makes a lot of sense, since I am treated as if I am a God.


But I also found out that He didn’t ride just the TRex in battle against the hordes of hell. He also rode some dinosaurs instead of camels, everywhere he went. When it was recorded that He came to town on a donkey, it was no donkey… it was a Barapasaurus and His side gig was a Barapasaurus baby sitter. All the throngs of leaves and branches thrown into the road were actually food for the baby dinosaur Jesus was carrying.

Unfortunately, this was the time that Jesus began riding side saddle causing all the other prophets to question if he was gay or not… 


But then, we find an old picture of BeulahMan, before his most recent incarnation (and when I had lots of hair) and we realize that not only was I gay back then, I was a weird dinosaur pedophile. I’m sure glad that some of these traits aren’t passed along with each new life.


h/t Vintage Faith

And just so that we are all on the same page about the Sabbath (and watching over it), it is obvious to me that if you feel you must cut the tongue out of your daughter’s mouth BEFORE burning her to death due to her recent Christian conversion, that your child is too verbose and probably deserved it. God knows that if it weren’t for His followers, there would be no one to keep the faith in line. BuelahGirl, you better watch yourself…

Saudi man kills daughter for converting to Christianity

Riyadh: A Saudi man working with the Commission for Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice recently killed his daughter for converting to Christianity.

According to sources close to the victim, the religious police member had cut the tongue of the girl and burned her to death following a heated debate on religion…

Then there is this arrest for the vile transformation from Islam to Christianity. In this story, religion proves, again, that it can repeat itself countless times throughout the history of the world and nothing changes. It wasn’t too long ago that the very same could be said about Christians converting to Islam and how barbaric those “Godly Men” could conduct themselves.

Granted, the Saudis would have my head for this blog. But so would have Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell, if they could have gotten away with it.

h/t Jonathon Turley


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