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Barack Hussein Obama 2nd pronounced [yoo mey fahynd yoor-self in ey byoo-tuh-fuhl hous with ey byoo-tuh-fuhl wahyf and yoo mey ahsk yoor-self: hou did ahy get heer ? ] is the 44th and current President of the Unites States a position he holds concurrent with the obscure but all-powerful post of FIRST Overseer, Savior and heartthrob imposing zugzwang. TEXT acronym “fo shiz”
He is the first African American to hold the office, and he previously held positions as the junior senator from Illinois, assistant manager of the Harvard co-op bookstore in Cambridge, and boom operator and best boy for the popular MTV series Jackass.
As the star of the scripted television series, the Audacity of Hope, Barack Obama is also the first work of fiction to be elected president. The pilot episode for The Audacity of Hope was filmed at the Democratic National Convention in 2004. Now in its fifth season, The unorthodox series combines elements of reality TV, Orwellian double speak, and relies heavily on an online, “Second life” esque element and aims to merge seamlessly with what most people now view as reality.
Executive producer Norman Lear, who created such TV hits as ALL IN THE FAMILY, THE JEFFERSONS and MAUDE heads a talented team of 100s of writers who now work around the clock and all over the world.
Some critics lament that most of the writers are also lobbyists and that the show has lost the edge that captivated America in earlier seasons. LEAR alternately responds to such criticism in iambic pentameter:
“Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! rage! blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drenched our steeples, drowned the cocks!”
Obama began his historic run for the presidency in February 2007. A massive product placement campaign with CNN, MSNBC and the Huffington Post ensured 24-hour hyperbolically orgasmic coverage for Barack for the duration of the presidential race. This combined with 150 years of built up white guilt ensured victory.
In the 2008 general election he defeated an American war hero and his running mate, a female Barbie born of a virgin who rode into town on the white horse of the apocalypse. Obama and was inaugurated into office on January 20, 2009.
All of the world worries will vanish by January 20, 2010.